We are the Snyder family and ... we are different

This is the story of our journey to our daughter in Ethiopia. God is preparing our family for her and preparing her heart to come home to her family. We chose the difficult road of trusting and obeying God. It is worth every step!

Friday, June 25, 2010

i know...i know

This blog is chronicling our journey of adoption, but really I think it's more of a journey of my faith. The past month or so my faith has been a roller coaster ride. I keep saying that I have faith in what God has planned for us but perhaps I keep telling myself that because I am not truly believing it. We have been through many ups and downs with trying to get our homestudy approved by our agency and yet to have it resolved. Yesterday I finally broke down and cried in the arms of my husband over the whole thing. I have been so frustrated with our local doctor's office and then it seems yesterday was the final straw that made me break down. The tears weren't entirely from the doctor's office lack of interest in getting my paperwork done it was simply all the emotions that I've bottled up over this adoption for quite some time now. It was the first time I've really cried in my husband's arms for a long long time. Last night I went out for a drink with a friend of mine and it was mostly conversation about what's been going on in our lives. It was so nice to talk about something else than the adoption and nice to just have the uninterrupted conversation. Yesterday was also the first day of a new bible study one of the MOPS moms started about spiritual gifts. The Christian conversation was good for my soul and a good reminder of what God has in store. This morning when I awoke there was a new feeling in my heart, one of submission.

I have been struggling with my lack of motivation this year to get back into running and really taking care of myself. When I woke up this morning motivation came back. I was trying to find it in myself instead of seeking it from the Lord. I got up early, put on my sneakers, turned in my bible to Ephesians and asked God to give me the passage I needed to start my day. He supplied me with Ephesians 4:17-5:21 about living as children of the light and imitators of God. It was a reminder to me of what my purpose on this earth is...to live for Him. I jogged 2 miles and then walked the last mile listening to Tenth Avenue North. It's amazing how every song I listened to that last mile spoke to my heart and reminded me of what trusting God really means and what it really means to have faith that all things are possible through Him. I raised my hands in praise to him as I walked and prayed. I know God...I know!

The adoption will move along at the pace it is intended to...not on my time. God deserves my trust...worry is just an idol. Does he not provide for the sparrows and how much more valuable are we than them? I can be a shining light unto this world if I let God work with me, through me, in me.

If you are praying for our family please pray that our homestudy will be approved very soon.
Please pray that God will continue to show Himself to us.
Pray that our little girl is safe and healthy and that Rwanda can get through these times of turmoil unscathed.
Pray for peace

2 comments:

About Me said...

Oh the ups and downs!

I've been there too lately.

I just posed about my dr's office also... Grrr.

schrecengostfamily said...

Continuing to pray for your journey to your daughter. It is such a blessing to be moving in this journey along side you and watching your faith grow is such an inspiration to me. God is using you to further His purpose for His kingdom in His time. Your daughter will come and she will be an amazing testimony to God's faithfulness to you and your family.